As I get older, I start to wonder why it's so difficult to find a good friend. The really funny thing about this thought is that I would say I have a reasonable amount of friends and yet I only consider one of them to be a good friend. As I sat at a lunch organized by my other half, I looked around at all the people in my life and I thought "I don't actually enjoy spending any time with you....or you....or even you...."
Now as harsh as this might sound, I can't help but honest about this. Every one of my friends has been accumulated over time, from High School, to my first job and so on and I started to realize that in each of those phases of my life, I had been a different person and as much growing there is ahead of me, I feel as though I have outgrown some of my oldest friends. It really is a sad state of affairs.
My birthday is coming up soon and I've decided to go away for a weekend of partying and just all round fun and for the first time in my life I can only think of two people that I would want to be there. The rest I would feel obligated to entertain. Who wants to spend their birthday weekend entertaining instead of being comfortable enough to enjoy themselves with people that don't expect something from them?
It's a conundrum, I find that all the things that wouldn't have bothered me 5 years ago is really starting to irritate me. Things like not pitching to a party and not letting me know, arriving at my house unannounced and expecting to be chatted to for hours, talking about the "old times" over and over until I actually want to fall asleep from extreme boredom. Maybe I'm being a little melodramatic? They're all my friends right? Is it just me or are good friends becoming extremely hard to find??
